You Know the Wild Years are Forever Gone When...

You've spent your evening feeding, bathing and tucking in the children and then relax to an episode of Myth Busters. And it's Friday night. And you didn't even realize it was Friday night until about 10:30. And then you blog about it...

One More Fatherhood Moment

Inspired by my friend’s fatherhood poem, I add this bit of a story. All true expect for the names:


The day's last moments lingered in the ribbons of pink clouds dipping to the west. They could still hear the carnival, the children's voices endless like a waterfall, the deeper hum of parents conversing, laughing, scolding. They had barely pulled Ian away, spending the last of their cash on a child’s football game requiring too much skill for a three-year old. The game operator gave him a toy anyway, just enough of a bribe to get the boy to finally leave.

He sat now in Dad's arms, clinging on in that way only tired children do. "We go 'gain tomorrow?" he asked.

"It's just here tonight," Dad answered, pretty sure the carnival would be around tomorrow but damn sure he wouldn't be going back.

"I wanna go tomorrow," Ian insisted.

"We're done with the carnival. It'll be back next year."

"I wanna throw foo'ball 'gain."

"We'll throw one at home."

"I wanna win."

"You can win." Dad stopped there, suddenly aware of a warm wetness against his side. "Ian?" he said, not really wanting to ask. "Did you just pee?"

"Yeah," the boy answered, drawn-out as if he too had just realized what happened.

"You peed on me."

"Yeah." There seemed to be almost a giggle to Ian's voice.

Feeling the wetness spread across his ribs and down his side, Dad walked on. There were three more blocks to go and he couldn't set Ian down now. In the end, the son always wins.

And Now, A Moment of Fatherhood

From good friend Rob over at NoFrowns Nation. If this doesn’t capture what it’s like to be a young father, I don’t know what does:

You asked for a hug
and to sit on my lap
But you couldn’t admit
your desperation to yack

I picked you up
to prevent your tears
you wretched and proceeded
to puke in my beard

You declared “I don’t feel good”
while I rubbed your back
You said “I don’t like this”
I thought, “Ditto that!”

Mom came to bathe you
and dispense of your clothes
while I cleaned the floor
and purelled my toes

But I’ll tell you what
as sure as can be
I’d gladly trade places
so you can puke on mommy

Don't Punish Parents for Overweight Kids

Well, that didn’t take long. Less than a month ago I predicted that we’d soon see an American case similar to the British decision to remove an overweight boy from his mother’s care (British authorities later decided to leave the child with the mother). Now, in Spartanburg, North Carolina, authorities are threatening to take a grossly overweight seven-year old away from his mother (CNN video link) if the boy doesn’t show some weight loss in the next two weeks.

The mother in the Spartanburg case has seen numerous doctors about her son’s weight and claims to do everything she can to regulate his diet and make sure he’s exercising. If you’ve watched the video, you know the boy is massive in an almost unnatural way. The mother herself is by no means thin but it’s hard to believe, even in an unhealthy eating environment, that any seven-year old could get as huge as the one in this story.

Without knowing more than what’s reported by CNN, I have to say that this looks more like a medical problem than a case of parental neglect. But even if the mother is letting he child have too many candy bars, should she lose custody of her son? Is unhealthy eating to be treated with the same government interventions as purposeful malnutrition and physical abuse?

As I said when last I wrote on this topic, if the government is going to get involved in our national weight issue, turning parents into the enemy is not the way to go. I have no problem if municipalities and larger governmental organizations want to provide funds to help parents with overweight children. But to take those children away from a loving family is a terrible solution.

Should Childhood Obesity be Considered Neglect?

A mother in Great Britain might lose custody of her son because the boy is significantly overweight. Officials are treating the case as one of possible child neglect.

Despite this story coming from the other side of the Atlantic, it certainly raises an interesting question. Should parents be held liable for childhood obesity? Here in the United States, the NIH has already declared the problem an epidemic as one in five American children are considered obese.

No one argues whether or not obesity in children is a serious health problem. It is. And parents simply have to be on the frontline in preventing the problem. But considering obesity as a sign of neglect seems more than just a little bit shortsighted.

Hopefully such a case won’t happen in the U.S. But with local governments already banning trans fat and some even considering a fat tax on junk foods, some municipality somewhere is bound to go after parents of overweight children.

But if the government is going to get involved in our national weight problem, reactive measures are not the way to go. Giving parents more tools (better/safer local parks, information campaigns, etc.) and providing children with more physical education in schools is far better than turning parents into the enemy.

The thing we have to remember about obesity is that it’s not cut-and-dry. What constitutes “fat” and which children actually suffer health risks are not matters of scientific certainty. Therefore, public policy cannot be rigid either.